a dream turned into a nightmare

Katamaran

2006-07-11T02:34:00.001-07:00

Katamaran ko.

Tinatamad ako magpost lately. Haha.

Monday (July 3)

No classes. Watched Bleach all day. Nakakabit na aircon. Yep, napikon sa dad ko. Feeling ko kinocompare talaga ako sa Ate ko

eh. Hindi nga lang sadya. Kasi kahit nag ti-TV si Ate ayus naman grades niya. Ako nga hindi nanonood eh. Asar. Basta, parang

ilolock niya daw TV ko. Eh ayus lang. Ang point ko ba't ako lang? Argh. Nagkwento siya ng yung kung paano daw sila mag-aral

noon. Farm kaya mabaho atsaka maingay tas mainit. Kaya binigyan niya daw kami ng aircon. Hindi niya daw alam kung mali

pagpapalaki niya samin kasi yung mga kaibigan niya daw pinagbabawalan yung anak nila. Eh hanu ba? Ba't siya gagaya? Hay. I

wanna watch JMuzic Fuzion. Ehem.

Tuesday

Classes again. Ha. Grabe. Ankulit ni Den. May sinulat kami na parang essay sa English na about ano nag influence sa kung ano

kami ngayon or sa nararamdaman namin ngayon. Ang Emo daw. Hanu ba. May poem rin eh. Skeleton something ang tawag. I forgot

kung ano sinulat ko. I'll post it kapag nareturn na samin. Asaran ulit kami nila Aimee and Jeremai and Den na bully. Haha.

Chemistry time, Ms. Castillo is going to leave us for Maryland. Aww. Somehow, sad ako 'cause nice naman siya eh. Haha. Atsaka

aliw. Sad nga eh. La pa silang anak and they did everything na except consulting a doctor. Why? 'Cause sabi ng husband niya

na kapag siya yung reason kaya di sila magkababy, he'll let her go. Grabe. Sweet. Pero. Whoa. Tas paguwi we went to Sta. Lu

and then Eastwood to get yung mga pinaphotocopy ko. Katext ko si Jeremai. Haha. Asaran ulit. Bully. Bratinella. At kung

ano-ano. Topic rin yung sa prom date niya. Naghahanap. Bigyan niyo nga. Pretty naman siya eh. Madali na makakahanap yun.

Haha. Ay nung morning rin pala, tumabi ako kay Chary. Haha. Tas benta si Lizzie. May napanood daw siya sa youtube. Yung "If

you were gay". Benta talaga. haha. NakakaLSS. Tas nung hapon nakalimutan na namin yung tune. Hankulit ni Joyen, nag greet na

siya ng Happy Birthday. Para daw una siya. Bawat salubong greet. Haha. Wow, naalala niya.

Wednesday

We made a video for Ms. Castillo. Club meeting. Ang saya sa club. Haha. Bait ng people. Madali magsalita. Tas yung theme

namin for sa issue ngayon ay "Youth" and "MC's 80th". For now wala kaming ginagawa aantayin pa namin yung works nila. Justine

and I will layout lit. Wee. Saya. Sana lang makaya ko. We were also asked to design the cover tas pipili na lang sila. Ang

hirap magisip. Ayoko ng masyadong literal. Ay, I have this schoolmate na medyo weird. Sinabunutan niya si psst because of

Jose Rizal. Kamusta naman yun? Lagi kasi siya inaasar eh. Hay. Pero okay naman siya compared kay psst kaya naman medyo natawa

na lang ako. haha. Ang sama eh noh. Nakita ko kasi yung scene eh. haha.

Thursday

We had a club meeting at lunch time. Haha. Wala lang. We practiced our song for acquaintance day. What I've been looking for

from Highschool Musical. May choreo pa yun ah. We performed na rin yung sa Filipino. Debate yung ginawa namin. Haha. Ang

gulo. Tas sobrang benta yung sa last group. Gawin daw bang musical ang pagkamatay ni Rizal. Haha. Andaming homework. Bah.

Nung uwian na naisip ko bigla na yayain si Chary sa bahay pero wala ako yung nagstay sa house nila. Ang kyut talaga ng Dog

niya. Si Chocolate. Ang hilig pa mandila. Kumain kami tas super nakakaantok kasi ang tahimik tas ang dilim tas ang labot ng

sofa kaya parang nakakaantok. Nagpakavain kami after. Haha. Actually ang baboy nga eh. Haha. Tas record, benta, Twinkle

Twinkle at mali-maling lyrics ng Miriam Song. Haha. Shet. After nun nagyaya si Ate sa Eastwood, photocopy siya. Nanlibre siya

ng Fazolis tas nagantay at tumambay ako sa photocopy habang nagiisip kung paano kami aalis para matreat ko si Chary 'cause di

naman siya close kanila Mar at paano ako magsasabi at manghihingi ng pera at ang naisip ko na lang ay Come What May. Haha.

Parang ang saya at nakakapagod ng work ni Ate Xerox doon. haha. Katext ko si Carmel doon tungkol sa problem niya. Haha. After

naman nagantay at tumambay doon sa may Country Style. Nagpaayos si Ate ng buhok. Aba, nagmukang normal na buhok and buhok

niya. Haha. Congratulations to her. Tas nung pauwi na kami may nakasalubong ang Hottie doon habang tumatawid at umuulan.

Sayang. Haha. Di ko natitigan. Haha. Quarter to 10 na ako nakauwi. Sa room ko natulog si panget eh. Haha. Kakaadik na yung A

Love to Kill. Ayun, pinayagan kami bukas.

Some pics:

This is Chocolate.

[click image for bigger view]

Friday

Acquaintance day today. Aga-aga puro picture na kami. Haha. Huwalalang. Dunkin' Donut ang dala ko. Nagmass kami tas balik sa

classroom. Paranoid ako kanina sa friend ko. Baka kasi akala niya nangiiwan ako. Buti na lang hindi. Hehe. Panay nga tabi eh.

Yay. Kasama ko parati ngayon sa classroom si Iris, Jeremai, Aimee and Roxy. Haha. Wala lang. Ang kulit.

Natuloy kami sa Eastwood. Para treat ko si Chary kasama narin si Ate Kat at Pat. Haha. Kumain kami sa Jack's Loft. Sa totoo

lang the whole time simula nung pumasok kami sa Jack's Loft nagaalala na ako sa bill 'cause 500 lang binigay sakin ni inay.

Dah. 4 kami kaya kulang yun. Si ate daw muna magpay ng sobra. Haha. Kakaorder palang namin naka titig na kami sa desert.

Meron kasi doon na fried ice cream. Nakakacurious kaya gusto namin itry. Nung magorder na kami aba di available. Asar. Nag

oreo cheesecake na lang kami tas si Chary nag Strawberry. Hehe. P1000.35 yung bill. haha. Pinaparemburse ni ate yung 500

niya. Naglaro kami sa Powerstation. Super aliw. Kasi nagtry ako ng ibang di ko pa nattry. Haha. Tulad nung yung parang dance

revo na kamay. Haha. Shet. Di maprocess ng utak ko yun kaya mali-mali. Expert na ata si Chary doon. Sabi niya nakaka P1000

daw sila sa Powerplant. Hayop eh noh. Tagal na nun. Malamang super galing niya. Tas before kami maglaro may isang guy na

super bigay na bigay siya maglaro doon. Meron pa siyang kasamang paa at may paikot-ikot pa siya. Nakita rin namin yung Ranada

sisters. Haha. Mga matatalinong magkapatid. Haha. Tas nagtry rin kami nung DJ something atsaka yung tambol. Haha. Aliw.

Before kami naglaro meron nung human statue na kapag binigyan mo ng barya gagalaw. Aliw. Kasi dalawa sila tas pinapagkiss

namin. Tas ang aliw. Niloloko namin. Haha. Tas yung Store with no name. Naaliw kami sa clothes nila. Ang ganda. Ang unique ng

designs. Tas si Chary super hyper na dahil sa cheesecake. Dinaldal at kinulit namin yung sales lady. Tas naisip namin ni ate

Kat na gawa rin kami ng ganoon. Haha. Pass 12 kami nakauwi. Haha.

Saturday

Buong araw akong tulog. Umuulan kasi. Lamig.Tas nagbrownout pa kaya mainit na rin. Dapat magaral na ako kaso nakakatamad eh.

Lalo na ngayon nakatakda ang JMusic Fuzion sa Kolumn Bar. Kaso siyempre maulan at binabaha na kami kaya parang malabo. Hay.

Habang hinihintay ang pagbabago ng panahon natulog na lang kami. Pagkagising nafeel ko pagtripan yung mga nagdedeliver ng

pagkain. Gusto ko malaman kung nagdedeliver sila kahit may bagyo at baha. Kaya tumawag kami sa Mcdo tas order kami ng 3

twister fries, 2 yung ice cream nila na may cookies and cream?, 10pcs na chicken nuggets... haha. Ang unang-una ko pa ngang

tinanong sa kanila eh kung nagdedeliver sila. Oo daw. Habang nagaantay kumain muna kami. Tas pagkakain after a few minutes

dumating na. Ang bilis nga eh. Tas lamon nanaman. Later noon nagyaya sila sa Big R. Nakita ko si Ms. Macapagal. Teacher ko sa

Filipino nung 2nd yr. Nagkawayan kami. Tumingin rin kami ni ate Kat ng magandang dami na bibilhin namin sa "project" namin na

yung sa damit. Nagsukat rin siya ng kung ano-ano. Tas foodtrip ulit. Bumili kami ng Banana cake, Mamon at Sylvanna ata yun sa

Red Ribbon. Tas bumili kami ng parang frap ng Mocha Blends. Haha. Grabe. Paguwi andun na sila kuya Keith at Pao. Kumain kami

tas nanood sila ng mga Videos at nakinood na rin ako. Kinikiliti ko rin sila at kinukulit si kuya Keith sa nahuli ko sa

kaniya. Bohahaha. Tas may Cable na rin TV ko. weee. Biglang sumakit yung tiyan ko kaya maaga akong nakatulog habang nanonood

si ate Kat ng Prince of Tennis.

Sunday

Kinain namin yung Sylvanna, Banana cake at Mamon habang nanonood ng Tenipuri. Sarap nung Banana Cake. Yam. After lunch nagdl

kami ng mga Yaoi anime. Gakuen Heaven. Search search ng yaoi. Nood ng bleach. Nood ng Gakuen Heaven pagkadl ng isang episode.

Pinanood rin ni ate Kat yung Sensitive Pornograph. Haha. Muntikan na kami. Biglang umakyat si itay. Nung gabi Fatima at

kasabay na rin daw kainan for my Birthday. Walang cake. huhu. Oh well. Tambay lang ako dito sa taas. May sari-sarili pa rin

kaming mundo. Si ate Kat P.C., Maan nood pa rin My Girl tas yung iba ewan ko. Kinikiliti ko rin si Koy Keith at Pao. Haha.

Problemado rin ako kung magaaral rin ako ng Geom. Katamad eh. Pero nagaral rin ako habang nung nanonood si Maan hanggang sa

magsialisan sila hanggang sa matapos ko yung Brother Bear, cute ng story. Hayun.

Finally natapos.

Ang Kahapon.

2006-07-02T20:13:00.000-07:00

Ang Kahapon

Bah. Help.

Si Jennie, mababaliw na, magsuicide na pero sasagipin ko siya para near death. Shet. Tangina kasi prof. niya. Mapili. Maarte. Dapat ng palayasin. One week nang nagiisip si Jen ng topic na makikita sa maraming libro at tatanggapin ng prof. niya. Wala ako masyado maitulong. Hay. Asar. Nagtatanong tanong at nagiisip isip na rin ako. Hay. La pa rin.

Whoa, I had a dream. It was weird.

May pinakilala sakin yung mga magulang ko na guy. Akala ko wala lang. Nasa kama kami pareho, may ibang tao rin sa piligid namin. Akala ko naging close lang kami. Kinukulit ko siya. Pinatong ko yung legs ko sa lap niya and then I removed it. Binabalik niya. Nireremove ko pero binabalik niya. Nung last na ganon na may sinabi siya about gusto niya dun lang na parang in a sweet way pero para sakin hindi siya sweet. That was when I realized na arranged marriage yun. I pretended na ayus lang pero umiiwas pa rin sa hindi halatang paraan. Ayoko siguro mapahiya family ko. Kinilabutan ako, I don't like him emotionally and erm physically. Nung time na yun, naalala ko bigla SIYA. What if siya na lang yung nandun? Mas masaya pa siguro ako [matagal ko na naiimagine kung siya ~~mapangasawa~~ ko and life namin, shet. I don't know if serious ako dun. Hindi ako nasuka.]. Pati ba naman sa dream? Haha. Okay. Parang di ko na kaya. Kailangan ko na ng makakausap or magbibigay sakin ng advice. Si Ate psst ang kakausapin ko. Ba't siya pa? Ex siya ni SIYA kaya parang nakakaistorbo. Hay. Nung umpisa pa lang nagpagkausap ko sa kaniya may nahawakan ako. Maraming needles tas tumusok sakin. Walang blood kaya inassume ko na hindi masakit so as I continued talking to her tinatanggal ko yung needle. Aba, masakit pala. The End.

Ginising ako eh. Pero sa lahat ng dream ko sa tingin ko may deep meaning 'to. Because of the needle and koneksyon ng mga tao. Bakit ko SIYA naalala nung time nay un? Ba't si Ate pssst pa at may needle? Hanlabo. I think it's something about me getting hurt because of her sa part ng needle... Pwede rin na nagkataon lang dahil sa topic namin ni Janelle na kung maniniwala ba siya kung mahal mo ba talaga ang person kapag naiimagine mo ang future with that person na hindi ka nasusuka at buo ang loob mo? and dahil chinismis namin si Ate psst? Hay. Hangulo. Pero nakakuha ako ng dream interpreter sa net. Hindi nga lang ako satisfied. Eto sabi.

Words like girlfriend: Feminine ideal, either integrated or rejected. Ready to accept or failed to a accept within yourself.

Words like marriage: You are ready to join or commit yourself to a cause. Joy without a profit.

Words like family: Kin. Group. Prosperous times ahead.

Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.

Words like or: Restricted vision. Cloud. Screen .Looking to hide certain feelings.

Words like friend: Joy and consolation. Aspect of self ready for integration.

Words like needles: Piercing. You are ready to get to the point somewhere in your life.

Words like needles: Piercing. You are ready to get to the point somewhere in your life.

Words like hands: Capacity and competence. Expect big work ahead, meanwhile must take better care of own affairs.

Words like blood: Essence. Life energy. Unfortunate love affairs. Severe disappointment.

Words like talking: Conversation. Communication. Seeking for a way to express something.

Words like friend: Joy and consolation. Aspect of self ready for integration.

Words like needles: Piercing. You are ready to get to the point somewhere in your life.

Hanlabo. Di ko gets.

Whoa, nawawala wallet ni dad. Nandun lahat. Hala na.

Ngayon na nagstart magbakbak para sa aircon ko. Yay. Pero di pa rin tapos. Bah. Ang gulo ng kwarto ko. Iisa-isahin ko nanaman yun. Hay. Back to start. Bah.

Bahhhhh.

Asar.

2006-07-01T09:30:00.000-07:00

Asar.

Know why?

Because while I was typing, an error ocurred and everything I've written is now gone. Fuck.

Argh.. Inhale. Exhale. Start all over again. Again. Again.

So. Today.

Pagkagising ko nagtaka ako kung ba't di nila ako ginising eh ngayon nakatakda ang pagkabit ng aircon ko. Nanood na lang ako ng Naruto. Dumating bigla si Itay at minarkahan kung saan man ilalagay ang aircon ko habang nanonood ako nakita niya yung part na nag Rasengan si Naruto at Ero-sennin kaya naman nung kumakain kami sumisigaw siya ng Rasengan. Haha. Aliw. Benta.

We went to Eastwood. Magpaparelax sana si ate ng ala pubic hair niyang buhok nakapangasawa kasi ng mayaman kaya naman ganon kaganda buhok niya ba't di na lang kasi magshampoo. Nakangupit nanaman siya sa asawa niya kaya ayun gagawin niya namang patay na buhok kaso kulang ang nakupit niya. Ayus. Maghahanap pa siya sa mascheap na parlor ba't di na lang kasi magwig or magpakalbo para mastipid, kuripot di naman marunong. Hay.

Dapat nga rin ngayon yung regalo ko eh. Tinakasan nanaman ako. Akalain mong kaarawan ko last year at Christmas gift ko ngayon birthday ko pa niya ibibigay tas panibagong utang nanaman para sa birthday ko ngayon. Hayop eh noh. Napunta na lahat ng pera sa buhok. Expert sa pagiging kuripot sa akin.

I photocopied Yellow 4 and Sweet Revolutin manga sa suki ko sa Cyber Mall. Woohoo~ Hottehs~

We went to Sta. Lucia to check on the prices but still no good. Doon na lang daw siya kung saan siya suki sa SM Megamol. Hayun. Nanlibre naman siya ng Zagu at Cream-O. Yum. Pinagpalit ko ang Jack's Loft or Cheesecake sa Zagu at Cream-O. Kamusta naman yun? Si Mariel oh! haha.

Namili siya ng Great Taste na tetra pack. 20 pieces. Baon niya daw. Goodluck sa bilbil niya at ihi niya. Puro caffeine yun. Iihi siya ng foam tulad nung nangyari kay ano. Ayus. Ginawa pa niya akong alalay. Tagabuhat at utusan. Kung ano-anong palusot.

Paguwi ko nanood ako ng Naruto hanggang sa magtext sakin yung friend ko.

Problemado kung paano daw itetext crush niya. Di ko kilala pero nagsuggest ako ng pwede niya itext. Unti-unti ko nalaman kung sino yung crush niya. Una kasi parang andali kung pano niya kakausapin pero alam ko na may kakaibang sitwasyon siya kaya mahirap nagdaan rin ako doon. Nalaman ko na nagconfess daw siya pero ayus lang daw sa tao. Edi madali pa rin. Hanggang sa sinabi niya I'm the 3rd person na sasabihan niya. Kamuka daw ng crush niya. May mahal daw na iba pero she's happy for them. Clueless ako kung sino crush niya na kamuka nung tinutukoy niya. Blind item ito. May dalawang tao na pumasok sa isip ko, yung dalawang yun ay mag M.U.. I was right with the other one. Shocking but not so shocking. Shocking 'cause siya pa of all people. Siya ang utak ng pagiging malapitin nung mag M.U. na yun or maybe something more in silence. Utak kung pano nagsimula na gawin nila yun. Not so shocking 'cause it's not hard to fall for someone like HER. Mind you, girl to girl ito, pati yung mag M.U. ay parehong babae. Hayop.

My friend... well... the other two are also my friend... anyway, tumawag na siya at kinuwento niya na. It started daw nung nagdadaydream siya nung C.L. class [see? C.L. classes are boring!], ay bigla daw dumaan sa mind yun taong yun and then that's when she realized that she has a thing for tw [I won't continue it. But that's the first two letters of her crush's code name. I know. Wala siyang tulong.]..psst. Ayaw niya daw mag fall hard 'cause she know na iiyak lang siya. I can't give her any advice 'cause people's feeling are not the same. Some advices may work and some may not and might turn into something worse. Nagsabi pa rin ako ng something light. The more kasi niya pagiisipan na kung pano niya pipigilan the more niya maiisip yung tao the more siya pwede magfall sa kakaisip. Sinabi ko sa kaniya yun at may iba pa. Basta if di niya na kaya sabi ko ilabas niya kung saan man ang madaling paraan sa kaniya. Shared some experiences rin na may help her. Uyyy experience daw. Ayun. Tapos we also talked about other stuff, one is design ng prom dress and the stag thing. Aba, tama bang isipin yun?

After that... tumawag ako kay Leidi, friend ko na lumipat ng school. Nagcatch up sa mga bagay-bagay and planned a larga sa Eastwood. haha. I miss her. I miss our laugh positions. Yes. We have positions for that. haha. That's because yun lang ginagawa namin kapag breaktime nung 1st year.

Tumawag rin ako kay Jennie but busy siya. Wala pa rin siya topic para sa research paper niya. Antagal na nun nagiisip. Grabe. Kailangan kasi ng maraming books eh.

Dami ko pa pala gagawin. Actually, wala na. Pero marami ipapass para sa susunod, magadvance na ako.

Guess what? Another stupidity just now. I accidentally pressed the sleep button. I'm glad sinasave ko na. Argh. Kundi nagwala na siguro ako.

I want to write a poem. Nakakakuha ako ng inspiration kanina habang nasa car pero di ako makabuo pa. hay...

Oh yeah, di pa rin nakakabit aircon ko. Bah.

Weee. I have something to share again...

YoungYoung

[click link above]

Anime version of Hyde. haha.

Hottie Hyde.

Nakuha ko kay Janelle.

Hehe. Huwalalang.

Bah. I'm off. I'm sleepy. I still have to wait for ate though... ako magopen ng door eh. I'll watch Naruto na lang.

God of Perfume, take meh~

Ang baho ko na.

Friday

2006-07-01T06:54:00.000-07:00

Friday...

I didn't update yesterday. Nothing much happened anyway.

No classes because of faculty retreat. On Monday too. Hooray.

I read Sweet Revolution Manga. Woohoo. Hotties~

Kumain kami sa bahay ni lola dahil may maliit na salo-salo. Kaarawan ni Ate Anne, 19 na siya. Sino si Ate Anne? Siya ang anak ni Manang Beth at kapatid ni Ate Mary Jane at bestfriend ni Rose. Sino si Manang Beth, Ate Mary Jane at Rose? Si Manang Beth ang helper ni lola at doon rin nakatira si Ate Mary Jane at si Rose naman ang helper namin na mukang 12 years old na makulit na nakakaasar at matining ang boses. Ba't sa bahay ni lola kumain? Kasi helper ni lola si Manang Beth. Eh ano? Doon rin nakatira si Ate Anne. Nagkaparty siya. Invited friends niya. Aliw nga eh. Gets niyo naman kung bakit diba?

Ang unusual kaya ng ganon. Kaya naman proud at mahal ko family namin. Di namin binabaliwala mga helper namin. Part sila ng family namin. Ganoon talaga dito simula noong bata pa ako, walking distance kasi ang bahay ng mga kamaganak namin sa mother side. Ganon trato namin sa helper namin. Kaclose ko yung iba. Si Rose medyo di ko pa tanggap kasi hindi ko feel makasundo pero kahit na lagi kumukulo dugo ko sa kaniya hindi ko naman siya inaaway. Tagapatay siya ng ipis eh. Hehe.

Si Ate Marites, Ate Rina, Ate Millet at Ate Relin. Sila yung mga nakasundo ko. Lahat sila wala na except kay ate Relin. Nakanila Tita Ellen siya nagwowork. Di pa ata ako pinapanganak nandoon na siya.

Si Ate Marites yung talagang kaclose ko. Una nga ayaw namin sa kaniya pero sa kaniya ako nasanay talaga. Kapag walang tao at kami lang siya ang kausap ko. Kinukwentohan niya ako at tinutulungan ko siya sa mga kalokohan niya. Basta. Miss ko na siya. Ayaw na kasi siya tanggapin ni Inay kasi daw walang konsiderasyon, madalas kasi pinapauwi sa probinsya tas ang tagal bumalik. Pinaltan siya ni Rose kaya parang di ko masyado kinakasundo si Rose at may iba na rin rason. Masaya nga ako nung nagbalik si Ate Marites kahit na hindi sa amin. Malapit lang naman eh kaya tamabay rin siya parati sa tindahan ni lola. Kaso umuwi ulit siya. Hindi ko alam kung magkikita pa ulit kami. Shet ang sad.

Si Ate Rina, Ate Millet at Ate Relin magkakapatid. Hehe. Si Ate Rina da best pagpatawa atsaka nakakahawa ang kaadikan kay Johnny Abarrientos sa Alaska. Ewan ko lang hanggang ngayon. Aliw talaga noon. Mainit ulo niya pagtalo tas kapag panalo nanlilibre. Haha.

Si Ate Millet kanila Tita Goya nagtratrabaho kaya naman lagi ako nasa bahay nila Tita Goya. Aliw rin siya. Lagi ko kasama at kung ano-ano pinagagawa namin. Umuwi siya kasi nabuntis. Hay kakamiss.

Si Ate Relin andiyan pa rin. Alive and kicking. Minsan pinupuntahan ko sa Bakery nila Ate Relin para makakwentohan at makulit. Hehe.

Enough. Grabe yun ah.

Nagkulitan lang kami nila Kuya Pao at Keith doon. Picture picture. Hayun.

Kuya Keith, Ako at si Kuya Pao

Kuya Keith at Ako

Nguso ni Kiisu-kun. Pakiss daw.

Ako kumuha niyan. haha. Bininyagan namin bagong phone ni Tito Boyet. Haha.

[click images for bigger view]

I was able to take a pic of my lola's piggy dog Whitney sleeping human style.

Aliw. Puro Boo na audible lang kami ni Kuya Tom kagabi. Haha. As in walang usap puro yun lang. World Record daw.

Nanonood ako ng Naruto vol. 25 til 4 am? haha.

Ay ay. The other one pala sa Magnificat is Justine. My classmate. Haha. I think may isa pa. I'm not sure.

Ay. When we had our Medical ek ek in school they said I really need to where glasses. I have one. Ayoko lang gamitin. It's pink and masnakakahilo. I think di tama grado nun. Pero I tried yung old glasses ni ate. Yun rin gamitin ko na frame pagmagglasses na ako.

Bagay ba?

Tapos... I'll show you a pic na pamatay. haha.

[click image for bigger view]

Yep. Kinuhanan ko nung lunch time nung 1st or 2nd week ng classes. Eh kasi. Tawa ng tawa di man lang niya alam na nakalabas na ang pwet niya. Haha. Ayan.

[click image for bigger view]

Same day and time. After I showed the pamatay pic to Marmar may cute kuting doon. Ayan siya. Daming ligaw na pusa sa school. Haha. Meron rin doon sa may Mini Forest eh.

Huwalalang.

Pssst.

2006-06-29T09:27:00.000-07:00

Pssst.

Psst. Haha. Aliw.

Nakakahawa sila Lyza. Puro sila psst. Haha. Nagpsst kami tas may lumilingon atsaka bawat sinasabi namin may psst pati code name psst. Haha.

Huwalalang.

Labo kanina sa Geometry and Social, puro mental block. Takte. Puro bagsak tuloy. Pair pa yung sa Geom. ah. Nakakataranta kasi si Sir eh sabi ng sabi ng time tas si Den ang kulit tanong ng tanong di tuloy kami matapos. Haha.

Inaasar ko si Den na bully tas "binubully" niya ako. Nagaasaran rin kami nila Jeremai at Aimee. Haha. Pinagtutulungan namin ni Aimee si Jeremai na bully. Haha. Labo.

We made a mask of our inner self in our English class. Mine was like the one in The Nightmare before Christmas. It has two meanings: one, I'm lonely and I'm tired of waiting that's why I'm falling apart and two, I can't express myself just like what Jeremai said.

Lonely = lips
Tired = eyebugs...este eyebags... haha.
Falling apart = a scar or lamat, sewed (I've given up before)
Can't express self = crosstitched lips

There, those are how they are presented.

Weee~ I was able to borrow Yellow 4 and Sweet Revolution.

Ah, I texted Dai last night to remind her of the Mangas and I also asked her if she wants something in return just tell me as long as it doesn't involve money, you know what she asked for? I was expecting that she'd ask me to download and burn her some yaoi animes but no she asked for a life time friendship instead. How sweet. I can't believe how mean I was to her. Hay...

I'm okay with her, again. Maybe not being with her for a long time helps...a lot. Haha. It's all good. weee~

Chary and I bonded awhile ago. Haha. Psst, supposedly, was the one to give me the Sweet Revolution manga as to what she told Dai but she was not on the bus. Argh. I don't like her, what she did make it worse. Hah. Whatever. I have a feeling that sinadya niya yun. She doesn't even know kung what time ako sasabay and then she'll ride the 5:00 bus. She didn't even made an effort on to how she'll give it to me. She doesn't know that I'll do everything just to have it. I'll meet up with her even if I don't want to if I have to. Lucky I, Chary was there to save the day. She was still in school so I asked her to look for Psst and take it and I'll get it from her when she gets home.

We met halfway, me coming from my house and she coming from her house. So, we met up in front of the Church and then walked our way through the main road to my house. While walking we talked about the time when I asked her to come with me to return the gate pass and get my mom's Makro card, she forgot to return it when she fetched me at pinagusapan namin ang kung ano-ano pang bagay kasama na ang harutan sa kalye. Supposedly, we're going to watch anime but instead, we talked. We talked about who/what we hate in school; teachers, schoolmates, etc, also, something about our personal life. Haha. I hope we do that more often. She borrowed some animes, mostly yaoi. Oooooh. Haha.

Beep.

God of Sleep, take meh~

Sigh...

2006-06-28T08:11:00.001-07:00

Sigh...

Last night, I told my dad about me passing Magnificat. I thought he'd say "Wow. Galing. Congratulations!" just like what my mom said when I told her the news and then he'll kiss me or something. After I told him he was like "uhh...(nagisip muna siya) galing ah. Pumasa ka nga pumasa ka naman kaya sa subjects?", ouch, he shouldn't have said the part about the subjects. I mean, ouch na nga sa part when nagisip muna siya, dapat yung part lang na happy siya, sama mo pa yung tone nung voice niya, it's different from he's usual reaction when he's proud of my/our achievements, is he not interested...I mean proud? Ouch. I erased that thought right away, he may have not understood the situation-- it's something for me. I was like "oh well." and I'm sure he didn't mean anything bad. He's not like that. It's also to remind me to not forget about my studies. But, you know, it bothered me, I don't know why. I know I'm right about what I thought. I guess he's reaction is really something new for me. Hay...

You may think that what he said doesn't seem bad and I'm O.A., yeah, that's what I think too everytime I read it, ignoring how he said it, but every time I remember his abnormal reaction, I'm like "hindi, may kakaiba talaga eh.". Gets? Parang ang labo eh. Basta, it seems like something is wrong. Hay...

Nakakaantok si Ms. Derige and Sir Prado. Argh.

We had our first meeting in Magnificat today, I was really nervous. I'm scared that I might not make it into our deadlines especially now that I'm in 3rd year, hardest year in highschool. What if they won't like my works? What if they won't like me? Wah. I hope they'll like me and guide me and that I'll be useful to them and that I'll be able to cope up with them and be as good as they are and get to know them and be happy with them and that I'll be able to pass my deadlines right on time...andami pa. Sigh. So help me, God. Amen. Anyway, when I met the layout staff, they were friendly and approachable and that helped me to not get paranoid and all. We're only 5 but I heard there's still another one who wasn't there. I want to meet people from other staff. Ay ay... parating di nababanggit yung layout staff ni Ms. Dizon-Phan, she think we're kulelats, I mean not THAT important. Muka niya. haha. But I still like her as an English teacher. Hay...

I like the poems we read in English kanina. They were about souls. No, it wasn't because of asoul. Teehee.

I was having a head ache at school kaya naman bagsak kagad ako sa kama paguwi at pagkakain. Hay...

Ah, I have an aircon na. Yay. Kabit daw nila sa Saturday. Yay.

Andami kong advance gifts for my birthday from my parents. I feel shame for flunking my quizzes and obligated to have good grades 'cause they're giving me everything they can when I'm not doing my best, a way of thanking them. Shet.

By the way, I'm not sure if the words I used are right. Sana maintindihan niyo. Sabihin niyo na rin sakin para matama ko. Thank You.

Ay, ay. My music player is playing. My counter is counting again. Haha. Yay.

Wow, ang serious ng post ko. Haha. More English pa. Hayop.

God of School, take meh~

Bwap meh

2006-06-27T03:28:00.000-07:00

Bwap meh

Why is that studying is not my priority? Fuck, it's just the 2nd week of school and all I get are flunked quizzes. We had our first quiz in Geometry and shit, I failed because I studied only the day itself. Karma. Sheeet. I need to pass all my quizzes; it has the biggest percentage in our grading system in Math this year. Not only in Math, I need to pass all my quizzes in all my subject and recite. Argh. I also failed my quizzes in Chemistry. Grabe. Di nanaman ako tatantanan ng armalite ni inay baka maging bazooka pa yun... hay... it's for my future. Kaya yan.

You know, at first I thought that my adviser being new is an advantage, but I was wrong, I don't like the way she teach and she comes in the classroom before the 2nd bell because she's paranoid. Argh. Kapansin pansin pa ang kanyang pawis sa kili-kili at likod. Nakakalimutan niya magdeodorant sa kili-kili at likod sa kakamadali para sa amin, awwww. Ang sweet. Hihi. The only thing I like about her is her cluelessness and she's lenient... I think? Bah. I also don't like the way my Geometry teacher teach. Lack of examples, eh, that's what we need.. Argh. They're so blurry...este labo.

I passed Magnificat. Shocking.

[click the image for bigger view]

Too bad some of my friends didn't make it. Asar. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't have tried there. Wah. Ja, Mica, Roxy, Paula... ang galing kaya nila magdraw and color. The art section is waaaaay harder than in layout kaya naman madali lang ako nakapasa. Layout kasi Photoshop eh. Marion made it in art section! I'm not alone.

Nung nasa bus ako kaninang umaga naalala ko yung interview. Naalala ko ang kilay nung mga naginterview sakin. Kinakausap nila ako.

Normal na kilay = umpisa pa lang eh.
Nakataas parehong kilay = nakasmile sila eh.
Nakakunot yung noo kasama na yung kilay = ang labo ko daw.
Nakataas yung isang kilay = err... what the fuck?

haha. wala lang.

Ah, I'll make kwento about my stupidity awhile ago. Our DSL requires a username and password before you can use it. When you open Internet Explorer, the page where in you'll type the username and password automatically appears. When I opened it The Page Cannot Be Displayed yung lumalabas. I thought may topak at toyo nanaman yung DSL that's why I waited muntikan pa nga ako makatulog sa upuan sa harap ng P.C.. After an hour naalala ko yung ginawa ko dati. Yung sa history ko titignan. Aba. Yun lang pala ang sagot. Peste. I wasted time. Stupid ko.

My status in YM right now is "ang stupid ko.". I got 4 replies. Haha. Grabe. May mga sadyang mabait at sadyang demonyo. haha.

My player is playing again. Haha. Now my counter isn't counting. Argh. What's wrong with them?

God of School. Take me~

Sfrwapy Day...

2006-06-26T06:09:00.000-07:00

Sfrwapy Day...

Hahaha. Huwalalang. Imbento. Pinaghalong scary, freaky, weird and happy. Haha. Eh kasi naman mga pangyayare sakin ngayon noh.

[click the image for bigger view]

List of those who passed the first screening Magnificat layout.

I passed the first screening of Magnificat. Hooray. Got the results earlier. Hehe. We had the second screening at dismissal time. Interview. Whoah. At first wala lang sakin 'cause I thought it would just be simple questions. That's why I was wondering why my friend who passed the art staff seemed so worried. Grabe pala interview. Wah. Super iba yung itsura ni Janelle nung pumasok siya dun sa interview room at nung lumabas siya. Kamusta naman yun? Kinabahan talaga ako pero I needed to go first kasi iiwanan na ako ng bus. Isa pa rin naman ako sa mga huli na ininterview. Bah.

Aba naman. The bus left me. He left me. Huhu. Taena. Grabe. Kakaiba. I have no load nor money nor someone na pwede makitext. I was able to text my mom earlier noon but when my sister replied aba naman Marion is nowhere to find. Eh kasi naman when I borrowed ten pesos from her so just in case I can call my mom using the phone booth, eh takte, I wasn't able to make a phone call na nga, it didn't return my money pa pati nga si Manang Guard tinanong ko kung pwede makitext eh, wala daw. Asar amp. The idea of taking a cab and then pay it na lang when I get home just like yung girl from the story sa Magnificat's Jolog's issue. But no. Takot ko na lang, patayin ako ng nanay ko. Don't worry... may himala! May isang hinulog... este... hulog ng langit ang nakita ko sa may phone booth. Hinagilap ko ang pangtapal ng muka ko para kumapal at nanghingi ng barya. May piso siyaaaaaa! First nagaalala muna ako kasi baka mangurakot nanaman yung phone booth pero nung sinubukan ko nakatawag ako! Wee. Eh aba naman ulit. I saw Marmar right after I called my Mom. Haha. At least I had a companion while waiting. Nilibre niya pa ako ng Coke and we talked about the Magnificat auditions at some other things. Haha. Ayun. My driver(Si ate, haha.)came first. Haha.

I didn't expect that my mom would say congratulations to me. I thought it would just be a normal na paguwi na wala lang. They're proud of me. Sarap ng feeling. It's my first time to join a club na ganoon eh. Haha. I'm not saying that they don't congratulate me everytime I achive something. Parang it's different this time.

It's so embarrasing~ Kanina sa classroom, we had an activity with a partner, my partner was Den. I pronounced the word piece to "pes". Bisaya eh noh. Isa pa, our teacher was talking about Jack and Jill tas I asked her "Di ba si Jack yung Itlog?" parang siya "huh? Si Humpy Dumpy yun." at parang ako "oh shet." aba naman di ako matigil sa kakatawa. Nakakahiya. Haha.

Pambawi sa hiya. My Chemistry teacher said "Monica, you're hot!". Aba naman. haha. Pero actually example lang yun ng temperature. Ako pa talaga eh noh. She even wrote it on the board. Someone erased it that's why I wasn't able to take a picture of it kaya yung sa notes na lang.

[click the image for bigger view]

Wala lang. Aliw. Ramdam ko naman. Haha.

Guess what? I killed a Cockroach. Ipis. Ipis. Die.

So there. I'm done. Bah. It took me more or less than 2hrs to finish this post. I'm watching My Girl and A Love to Kill kasi eh. Haha. Kaya every commercial akyat tas baba ulit. Haha. Exercise rin, wasn't able to do my plan kanina eh dahil sa audition. Dapat magwalk ako from bahay to labasan and then back sa bahay. Oh well. I'll try to it tomorrow. hehe. Gusto ko na pumayat!

Sana pumasa ako. Hay...

Pagpasensyahan niyo na nga pala kung conyo ako. Gusto ko kasi English hindi ko nga lang maiwasan ang Tagalog. Masmarami tuloy ang Tagalog. Haha. Sana masanay na ako ng straight. Hay...

Oh...there's a problem with my Music Player. I'll fix it kapag makakuha ako ng free time.

Paalam~

Bah.

2006-06-25T09:29:00.000-07:00

Bah

Argh. Asar talaga. I received a LEAP letter and I don't think it's a big deal... well it's a big deal 'cause I have poor grades but I didn't really feel like worrying and act like "whoa?! Oh no! Shit. Dangerrr!". Why? Because MC is kurakot and I think more than half of our class received one. Meaning:

+I'm not alone.

+They gave "love" letters to almost everyone not really thinking about it(if they really need it or not) so that they'll receive more money.

It's really expensive. I think it's P2,000 per subject and per quarter. Muka silang pera. I bet after like less than a decade you'll see their faces sa mga money. Grabe.

Eh ayun nga. I forgot to give it to my parents last friday. I remembered it only awhile ago. I didn't really think that papansinin nila yun, I guess I was wrong. So I thought pagsasabihan lang nila ako na "oi Mikki, pagaaral mo ah.". Nope, una umakyat yun mom ko, expected na yun and then my dad, still expected but I find it annoying kasi they wanted to talk to me dun sa time na nanonood ako eh I waited for it for a veeeery long time. So while it's still in commercial my dad talked to me. I told them na sila bahala if they want me to take it or not 'cause they'll be the one paying it not me, lalo na they keep on saying na always negative kami. I don't really want to take it because one, I don't want to go home late, two, it's expensive, parati pa sila nagrereklamo na negative na kami ayoko na dumagdag gastos and three, I want to do things my way. End na ng commercial kaya medyo lumalabas na init ng ulo ko kaya pinakawalan na rin ako. Kaya rin siguro ako hinigh blood bukod sa pinapanood ko eh iba yung lumabas kaysa sa ineexpect ko. Ayoko ng ganon.

I understand them though. First of all, it's their first time to receive something like that and It's about my future. Maybe what really got to my senses was the feeling that they were comparing me to my sister when she was still in highschool but I keep on telling myself na hindi at pinapabayaan ko na lang. Although I felt that way I know they didn't mean it that way.

I felt like crying. If not because of my cousin my tears would have fallen. Hindi kasi nila alam. Muka kasi akong concentrated sa pinanonood napagkamalan nga akong kinikilig. Buti na lang. Kung hindi papansinin nanaman ako lalo lang ako maiiyak. Everytime I'm crying the more they ask me why or pinapatahan the more ako naiiyak. Buti na lang talaga. That could've been annoying.

I was watching High School Musical awhile ago. Ang tagal kong naghintay. Summer pa lang noon. But at those times na excited ako ay ayoko rin 'cause the date is on June which means may pasok na. Damn. Eh, so there. Maganda yung story lalo na yung songs, meron diyan sa playlist ko. Ang hot pa nung guy. Haha. Cute rin yung girl. Teehee. Ayun.

Ah, tommorrow... este later is our interview for Magnificat and we'll know the results on tuesday... este tomorrow. Wah, sana pumasa ako. I took the layout section. Haha. I'm not good at art eh and not so good in writing poems and I think it's easier to pass sa layout kaya pagpumasa ako saka na lang ako mag pass ng poems. I'm worried nga lang... 'cause I wasn't able to finish the hands on test. Ang panget ng nagawa ko. Er.. the laptop was so slow and the time alotted was only 20 mins. Hay. Goodluck.

Ay. Doon sa interview sheet, there was a question "In a creative way, write how badly you want to be part of the Magnificat.". That's why I made a very short poem.

I'll make the moon permanently blue
Darker the night will be
How Selfish of me
I want to be in Magnificat so badly
So forgive me

Haha. I don't think it makes sense. Kung oo, medyo lang. Haha. I hope maaliw sila doon. Wah. Kapag di ako makapasa... saan ako? Photography? Ayus lang. Gusto ko rin. Ayaw ko lang kay Sir Gani. Haha. Shet. Huwalalang.

Oooh. By the way, I'll tell you something about sa ASOUL thing.[thanks Janelle!] Asoul kasi is not really A Soul it's asshole. Haha. Wala lang. It reminds me of someone who's always being called an asshole. hehe. I miss that person. Hay... Anyway, that's another story. I'll find time for me to write about it.

Bah. I'm off to bed. Argh. 3 hours of sleep. Poor me. Hay...

Devirginized...

2006-06-24T02:59:00.000-07:00

Devirginized...

It's my first time today. I've longed for this day. It feels good. Finally, after a long time(in seconds) I decided to post my very first entry in my blog.

I knew it. You thought I'm not a virgin anymore. Haha.

About that part ^(arrow), I may or may not be.

Haha.

Anyway, it's not me. It's my blog.

Wala lang.

Hopefully I won't get lazy updating my blog anymore. I had lots of blogs that I got tired of updating in less than a week and some were totally blank. Maybe I'm not really up for this thing, parang trip ko lang siguro. I want to take this seriously. Bah. Goodluck to moi.

As you can see my layout is about loneliness. That's because I think that's what I'm feeling right now. People may think that I just think that way so I'd look like I'm emo or something and that I have friends and I'm happy with my family and my life is good so there's no reason for me to feel that way. Hell, no. Oh well, that's what they want to think eh. Doesn't matter rin naman. I, too, don't know why I feel that way. Just like what I've said "I have friends and I'm happy with my family and my life is good so there's no reason for me to feel that way.", that's why I'm wondering why. Whyyyyy? Argh.

Hmm...

Or maybe there's a reason...?

It could be because of...

THAT person?

I don't think so...

I hope not.

Pero may naisip ako... I have this feeling that I want a person whose attention is with me. I want someone who's interested in me. No, it's not a lover that I need, could be though. It could be a friend... a bestfriend. It could be a girl or a boy. Basta...

I want to be someone's VIP.

I want to have the feeling na I'm the first person to come in that person's mind to make kwento everytime there's an important, good or bad event in his/her life, tipong sasabog na siya of excitement. Haha.

I've been waiting to have someone like that since birth...

still waiting...

Pinapansin ko kasi eh. Ano ba yan?

Oh well...

As long as I'm still contented with my life.

I'm happy.

Labo... contented nga tas happy...

haha.

So there... hope to find him/her soon...

hay...

The one at the title bar I think has another meaning about me being lonely... or baka wala? Ang alam ko meron. Haha. I don't remember na eh. It's from an English translation of a Japanese song. I liked it from the moment I read it. Haha. Love at first sight.

Weeee. I'm eating Boy Bawang. hehe.

Sige na. That's all for today.

Bleh.